Monday, June 9, 2008

At least we don't have any viruses

One sure thing that a luser will say to you when you criticize his shitty operating system goes something along the lines of "but at least I don't get any viruses."

Good for you dude. I don't get any viruses from your mom either. I'm protected. So please cease and desist your blabbering. Are you trying to convice me that not getting any viruses is a symbol of high quality of your choice of software? The fact that you're attributing that characteristic to Linux has already earned you a spot on my hate list.

Besides, I can make my computer immune to viruses. Just watch. Pop! Did you see that? I unplugged my network cable.

The luser wretches, "Oh but that makes your computer useless!" Yeah, well so does putting Linux on it. What's your point?

The truth is, an OS's low virus infection rate in and of itself means jack shit. I can write the code for 10 OS's that don't get viruses for you in 3 minutes. Fuck, that's faster than Stanley Jobson.

Macs don't get viruses either. Because like your OS, they're a small part of the installed base.

But actually, what no one talks about is that writing a virus for Linux is really hard. And that's not necessarily a good thing.

The luser whales, "OMG, But how can that be? BBQ!"

You see, a virus needs to make certain assumptions about your platform. Certain libraries existing, with particular ABI's. Certain data being accessible through particular API's. In other words, a common set of core components that are available on every install of your system so that the virus's code can be small and compact and yet infect as many machines as possible.

Wait, this sounds familiar. Oh yea, that's right: real software needs that too. Why is there no proprietary software for Linux? because for all practical purposes DEPLOYMENT IS IMPOSSIBLE. The Linux market is so small that there's no point going after it unless you try to support all Linux deployments. Hmm, well what does that mean? At least 3-4 major distros, which all have multiple versions of the past few years with different kernels and different libraries and different versions of GTK and different ways to integrate into the start menu, and different broken versions of evolution. Fuck me! Sounds like awesome fun. I'm glad people have all these choices. They can have another choice: FUCK OFF! I DON'T WANT YOUR FUCKING HIPPIE MONEY!

"The web is the future of application delivery." Yea, good one dude. I see Google making fistfulls of dollars with that idea, but what the fuck are you doing with it? Go ahead, cling to your Linux like it's the only thing that might ever give you sexual pleasure... if you could only find the right compilation flags (btw, did you try -fuckme?) Maybe web-apps are the future. But I'm pretty sure it's at least 5-10 years out, so have fun hacking on your ATI drivers until then.

279 flames:

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Jake said...

Hell, there isn't even a decent XFire client. What a misery!

Linux is free from viruses, BUT FREE FROM DECENT APPS AS WELL!

Windowz FTW!

Anonymous said...

You are a total dumbass.. Linux has in only a couple of years taken over the mobile world.. Almost 40% of handsets are Android..

Linux servers serve 73% of all websites online.. I would hardly call that small peanuts now would you!!

Linux server is so good that even microcrap use it.. Google Netcraft and then enter download.microsoft dot com and you will see.

Linux is the ONLY desktop with a growing marketshare becuase Microcrap have just fallen below 90% for the 1st time ever.. Linux has google on board, Linux now has Yahoo on board aswell..

Linux saves companies ££££££ because there are no licence fees to pay.

Linux Mint is the most usable desktop there is, it boots straight off a cd or usb and you can be online in less than a minute watching youtube or listening to music, chatting on msn or whatever, it's all ready to go.. You can also edit your hard drives and move files around and partition from a live cd/usb.. You can then install it which takes minutes and provides more functionality than windows provides in 5 hours wasting time installing and setting it up.

Don't you hate it when windows says.. The file is currently in use by another program! Doesn't happen in Linux..

91% of all the worlds supercomputers run Linux and in the top 500 supercomputer list, they are every computer in the top 10. Supercomputers run the world.

People are flocking to linux in their droves as you just can't compete with free.

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Linux and the Power of Open Source said...

I'm here not in the defense of Open Source nor Linux but one thing for certain many things we used in everyday life you wouldn't be using right now. Look in your hands are in your pocket...you probably have a Android Phone or tablet(I seriously doubt you have a Windows phone). The next time you stop at the traffic light just be glad it's not powered by Windows(powered by Linux). Next time you need that gallon of milk just now the robotics are powered by Linux(not Windows) Hate Linux or love Linux is not going anywhere any time soon.

Randall

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So I guess you didn't feel the need to put effective anti-spam filters on this blog.

Eh. Its not like software holy wars contribute much more than spam anyways so nothing of value was really lost.

Ubnutu user said...

I think the web apps comment has legs. Only have to wait till next year. The problem is not viruses - it is trojan's. If one hacked my PC and all my online bank accounts were stolen, my life would be ruined.

It is not worth the financial risks for me to go online on Windows or other operating systems. Sorry, you may think me a geek for using Linux, but I find it easy to use and I can sleep at night knowing it is unlikely some cheeky hacker hasn't go access to my credit cards, bank accounts and pension.

And I am a gamer and Valve have made me very happy by releasing Steam on Linux. Also with Android becoming the most popular operating system this year, Linux is here to stay :D

JRW said...

I know your blog is called "Linux Hater's Blog" and it seems like you're trying to inject some humor into it with over-the-top hating, but seriously, it's not that bad. I use linux on my home desktop and cygwin/unix/linux at $work. Yes, there are lots of things that could be better and lots of things that suck.

Nonetheless, for me, it's a wonderful miracle. My life would be "torture" if there were no linux/unix (given the current alternatives). And, just think -- you'd have to write a Windows Hater's Blog or OSX Hater's Blog instead.

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